I Will Make You Tartar Sauce
by Nobody-Knows76
Summary: It all started with the spaghetti jokes with the kid wearing scarves in hot weather- then havoc started. "…did you just kidnap me?" "Kufufu. No." I sat on the sofa. "No sitting on my sofa, my dear hostage." "Screw you." In which not all Reborn! females are that dense. (Hibari Kyoya /OC)


"Herbivore, give me the file on the table."

I throwed the file at him, resuming to my fish burger. What can I say- tartar sauce for the win! and he glared when it met him full faced. Hibari Kyoya has been (de) filed. I laughed, and squeaked when the file slammed at me in full force.

"Oh shitty_ fuck." _I groaned, plucking the file off my face. Massaging my nose, I turned to the hair-tousled boss of mine," Do you have to, Kyoya?"He seemed to glare even more. He didn't like to hear curses in his office. Kusakabe had told me many times about that- but old habits die hard so-haha. I shall die today. And we still weren't on first name basis-but we'll get to there someday!

He leaped up from his sofa and growled, stalking towards the desk that I was currently sitting on in all his sakura glory.

"Do you want to die, herbivore?"

"Fuck no, Kyoya!" I wailed.

I forgot, mentally smacking myself on the head. He usually was in a bad mood after waking up from his afternoon nap. Seriously, he's like-24? now- and how the fuck he still stays in this school and still takes afternoon nappies makes me cry.

"I _will _bite you to death." I laughed.

"Very kinky, Hibari-san." He took out his tonfa and threw it at me. And because I didn't have the best reflexes in the whole world, I fell onto the carpet and it flew right past the opened window behind me.

" _And I was like Baby Baby BABY OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-" _I took my hand phone I don't pick up phones-so I had just the best song to give me that jolt to pick up unnecessary calls…story of my life.

_Oh, Fuuta?_

Kyoya stared at the window, and then to me then to the innocent electronic device in my hands.

No cellphones in school.

"_I will bite you to death." _I grabbed hold of a screwdriver that was in the drawers, which he actually smirked. Hibari Kyoya smirking usually meant a) you did something good…..cuz I haven't see the guy smile before except to his bird. And Hibird was not here, so most likely option B.

b) He's going to beat the crap out of you and you're putting up a pointless fight.

No shit Sherlock. He grabbed out his other metal pole of doom, and I took my emergency escape route. _I don't even think I'm going to live till 21._

At first, I didn't know what to do to him.

Sure as fuck, I knew he was sadistically violent the first time I saw him in junior school- nobody sane half-murders a new student on their first day at school- and I had been oh-so determined to keep away from him during the years that this torment would provide in Japan.

How fucking wrong I was.

He was a typical Japanese guy-on scales of 1 to 10 on hotness, I would most probably give him a 7, (he was still shorter than me when I first met him at the age of 10) and lived in a typical Japanese house in Namimori, the area that I have to live since Dad had to move here for his company which name's I don't even know. But seeing him now? I give you a ten, Kyoya.

Screeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew puberty.

And the mafia, too.

I still have to admit-him being my boss was awesome.

Oh. My name is Kenryura Mazaki.

I don't know what my name means so don't even ask.

"Kyo-san…" Kusakabe opened the door, a blonde- haired behind him. I waved my hands like at the both of them ( SOS signal) and then my cellphone rang again.

"_GOT MY HANDS UP, THEY"RE PLAYING MY SONG"-_bleep.

Hey Zaki, can you help the sushi bar tonight? Dad says Jin took another day off again. :D Reply me when you can, yeah? (Say "Hi" to Hibari for me. :D)

….fuck you and your smiley faces, Takeshi.

_Let's just say that the Reception Room got demolished, my tartar sauce evaporated, a Mafia Boss went straight to the hospital along with a PMS-ing me, Hibari Kyoya had to pay our hospital bills (I ate 19 fish burgers and Dino ate 3 bowls of pasta) and Yamamoto Takeshi is going to be dead when I get out there. _

"_Herbivore."_

"Fucketty fuck fuck fucking hell fuck-"

_slam_

* * *

_As you can see- I replaced this one to the other one because that one was not the one I wrote._

_Oh._

_I forgot to put the disclaimer. Eheh._

_Me no own Katekyo Hitman Reborn- I own tartar sauce. And Mazaki. And Kyo-_

_Fuck count : I don't even want to count lol. :D_


End file.
